Unleashing Your True Self: The Guide to Living Authentically
- Elly

- May 4, 2023
- 6 min read
Updated: May 7, 2023

For much of my life, I did not live an authentic life. I tried to mold myself to others hoping it would help me fit in. All it led to was an unhappy and unfulfilled life. When I was in college, I highlighted my hair (normally black with some lighter tones from the sun) to blonde streaks. Why? Because that's what everyone else was doing and I thought it was the cool thing to do. Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with highlighting your hair - I think it looks beautiful. However, I did it for the wrong reasons: external, not internal. I spent a lot of money with the upkeep, but didn't really feel like it was "me". That was just a microcosm of the bigger picture.
Throughout the years...
I learned to love myself.
I learned that it was exhausting to pretend to be someone else that I'm not.
I learned to be who I truly am.
Living an authentic life means being true to yourself, your values, and your beliefs. It's about living a life that feels genuine and fulfilling to you, rather than trying to conform to expectations or societal norms. But what does it mean to live an authentic life, and how do you cultivate authenticity in your own life? In this article, we'll explore the concept of authenticity, the benefits of living authentically, the dangers of not living authentically, and provide tips and strategies for living a more authentic life.
Defining Authenticity
Authenticity is a term that's often used, but not always clearly defined. At its core, authenticity means being true to yourself. It means living a life that feels genuine and aligned with your values and beliefs. It's about being honest with yourself and others, and not trying to hide behind a facade or pretend to be someone you're not.
Authenticity is about embracing your unique qualities and quirks, and not trying to fit into a mold or conform to societal expectations. It's about being comfortable in your own skin and accepting yourself for who you are, flaws and all.
The Benefits of Living Authentically
Living authentically has many benefits, both for yourself and for those around you. When you're true to yourself, you're happier and more fulfilled. You're not living a lie or trying to be someone you're not, which can be exhausting and draining.
Living authentically also allows you to form deeper and more meaningful connections with others. When you're open and honest about who you are, people are more likely to trust you and feel comfortable around you. Authenticity can also inspire others to be more authentic themselves, creating a positive ripple effect.

The Dangers of Not Living Authentically
On the other hand, not living authentically can have many negative consequences. When you're not true to yourself, you may feel unhappy, unfulfilled, and disconnected from yourself and others. You may also struggle with stressful or anxious feelings, as you try to keep up a facade and pretend to be someone you're not.
Not living authentically can also damage your relationships, as people may sense that you're not being genuine with them. It can be difficult to form deep and meaningful connections when you're not willing to be vulnerable and honest with others.

The Obstacles to Living Authentically
Living authentically can be challenging, especially in a world that often values conformity over individuality. There are many obstacles that can get in the way of authenticity, such as societal expectations, fear of rejection, and a lack of self-awareness.
Societal expectations can be a powerful force, pushing us to conform to certain standards and norms. Whether it's the pressure to look a certain way, pursue a certain career path, or fit into a certain social group, these expectations can make it difficult to stay true to ourselves.
Fear of rejection is another common obstacle to authenticity. We may worry that if we show our true selves, we'll be judged or rejected by others. This fear can be especially strong if we've experienced rejection in the past, or if we've been taught to value the opinions of others over our own.
Finally, a lack of self-awareness can make it difficult to live authentically. If we don't know who we are or what we value, it's hard to make choices that feel authentic and aligned with our true selves.
Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability
One of the keys to living authentically is overcoming the fear of vulnerability. Vulnerability means allowing yourself to be seen as you truly are, flaws and all. It means being willing to share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with others, even if it's uncomfortable or scary.
To overcome the fear of vulnerability, it's important to start small. Share something about yourself with a trusted friend or family member, and see how it feels. Gradually work your way up to sharing more vulnerable aspects of yourself, and pay attention to how it affects your relationships and your own sense of self.

Discovering Your Authentic Self
To live authentically, you first need to discover your authentic self. This means getting in touch with your values, beliefs, and passions, and understanding what makes you unique. To do this, you may need to spend time reflecting on your life and your experiences, and asking yourself some deep and meaningful questions.
Some questions you may want to consider include:
What are my core values?
What are my strengths and weaknesses?
What brings me joy and fulfillment?
What are my long-term goals and aspirations?
What kind of person do I want to be?
As you explore these questions, be honest with yourself and try not to judge your answers. Remember, living authentically means accepting yourself for who you are, without judgment or criticism.
Living in Alignment with Your Values
Once you've discovered your authentic self, the next step is to live in alignment with your values. This means making choices that are consistent with your beliefs and passions, and avoiding choices that go against them.
Living in alignment with your values can be challenging, especially if you're used to going along with the crowd or trying to please others. But remember, living authentically means being true to yourself, even if it's not always easy or popular.
Honoring Your Emotions
Another key to living authentically is honoring your emotions. This means allowing yourself to feel your feelings, even if they're uncomfortable or difficult. It also means expressing your emotions in a healthy and constructive way, rather than bottling them up or lashing out at others.
Honoring your emotions can be challenging, especially if you've been taught to suppress or ignore them. But remember, your emotions are a valuable source of information about your needs and desires. By paying attention to them, you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself and make choices that feel more authentic and fulfilling.
The Power of Personal Growth
Living authentically is a lifelong journey, and it requires ongoing personal growth and development. This means being open to new experiences, learning from your mistakes, and continually striving to become the best version of yourself.
Personal growth can take many forms, such as reading self-help books, attending therapy or coaching sessions, or trying new hobbies and activities. Whatever form it takes, the key is to keep learning and growing, and to never give up on the pursuit of authenticity and fulfillment.
Tips for Living Authentically
Here are some tips and strategies for living a more authentic life:
Practice self-reflection and journaling to increase self-awareness.
Surround yourself with people who support and encourage your authenticity.
Set boundaries that protect your values and beliefs.
Embrace your strengths and weaknesses, and celebrate your uniqueness.
Be willing to take risks and try new things, even if they're outside your comfort zone.
Practice self-care and prioritize your physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
Seek out opportunities for personal growth and development.
Conclusion
Living authentically means being true to yourself, your values, and your beliefs. It's about living a life that feels genuine and fulfilling to you, rather than trying to conform to expectations or societal norms. While it can be challenging to live authentically in a world that often values conformity and superficiality, it's also incredibly rewarding. By embracing your authentic self and living in alignment with your values, you can experience greater happiness, fulfillment, and connection with others. So, take the first step today and start living your best life, on your own terms.
If you're ready to live a more fulfilled and authentic life, let's connect here to set up a complimentary 15-min. discovery session. We'd love the opportunity to serve you!
You are worth it!




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